Tuesday, October 21, 2014

My dog probably gets more email than your dog

It's a typical day in Ollie-land. Ollie probably gets more email than your dog.

After some consideration, I think this should be my new standard response to all the "Dear Ollie" emails that I receive. It's not that I mind people emailing Ollie, it is just that I wish they knew Ollie was a dog.

Dear requester,

Ollie will be unable to fulfill your request to become an ambassador, review your product, post your info-graphic, or share your Kickstarter campaign. He is generally uninterested in learning about blog topics that you think his readers will enjoy and doesn't have the power (or desire) to accept a guest post or advertising on the blog. You see, Ollie is a dog. 

He's pretty smart, but he's not that smart. The day I teach him to type and respond to these emails is the day I retire and go on a permanent vacation. My blogging services will no longer be needed. I've heard of dog with a blog, but this is not it.

Running with Ollie Blog

I would never actually send an email like that, but last week I came close. Maybe after 100s of Dear Ollie emails, I finally snapped. 

I don't usually rant on this blog. Honestly, I am not a ranting kind of person (I usually keep things bottled up inside until they explode, like a normal person) but I have something to say.


I received a Twitter direct message that said something to this effect (I already deleted it):

"Dear Ollie - We'd love your support in sharing our Kickstarter campaign on your blog for our awesome new amazing fitness product. Thanks so much."

I must have been in a bad mood that day, because under normal circumstances, I would have simply deleted and blocked. But something just rubbed me the wrong way. 

I responded:

"I mean this in the nicest way possible (I didn't really mean it nicely, just trying to soften my out-of-character snarky response). Before you ask someone to do you a favor that benefits you 100% and benefits them 0%, you should make sure you get their name right first. :)" 

You like the :)? Because that makes it nicer, right? 

I should not have been at all surprised that the requester responded with his own snarky response. 

(again deleted, so paraphrasing)

"You have to admit your Twitter name is misleading and I disagree with your second statement, Most bloggers are interested in great new fitness content. I don't think this relationship is going to work out. Thanks anyway."

Way to reject me after I reject you. 

Yeah, I had more to say, but I didn't feel like getting into a social media argument, so I did what I should have done in the first place. Delete. Block. Don't you worry, mister. I'll be blogging about this. 

Yeah, he's not wrong. My Twitter name is misleading. Running with Ollie. If you only read my Twitter name and don't bother to click through to my blog or even read my Twitter profile, then I can see how it would be confusing. But the thing is that you are asking me to support you, but you can't even support me enough in return to learn my name. 

Twitter profile: I'm Lea, health & fitness blogger, fashion enthusiast, runner, writer, #sweatpink & #fitfluential ambassador & Pgh Steelers fan in DFW. Ollie is my dog.

If he had taken the time to actually click through to my blog before he asked me use my influence and reach to promote his product he would have found that my ABOUT ME page is called ABOUT LEA, I have a video on my side bar called MEET LEA and I sign every single blog post that I write with my name.

So if he would have read my Twitter profile first or clicked through to my blog, it would not have been difficult to figure out my name.

But then again, I get it. He doesn't care about me, and that's really OK, I don't care about him either! He doesn't even know me. He doesn't "love my blog." He was simply looking at my social media numbers and blindly sending requests to me and 100s or 1000s like me in hopes that a few will respond positively. The request had nothing to do with me at all.

But the one-sided request is annoying enough, calling me the wrong name is like rubbing my nose in it. (Ollie only gets his nose rubbed in it when he is bad.)

It reminds me of a story from my dad. He goes by his middle name. He told me once that he loved when he would get calls from people addressing him by his first name, because he would instantly know that the person on the other end of the line didn't really know him. It was an easy way to weed out the sales calls. He knew without fail that anyone that addressed him by his first name did not know him, that they were reading a name off of a paper. Period. And that is how I feel about "Dear Ollie" emails.

Thanks for helping me weed out the PR pitches from people who have no idea what I am all about.

And every once in a while I get a "Dear Hollie" email. Hollie must be Ollie's long lost sister.

Does your dog ever get emails? Thanks for letting me get out a rare rant. Writing about things keeps me sane.

If you really want to send Ollie an email, I'd be happy to read it to him, I can't promise he will respond.

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Keep Running,


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  1. Ah, don't you like my dear Ollie tweets and messages? Seriously, though. I get it.

    1. ha ha. Yeah, I really don't mind if someone does it on Twitter just responding to something I posted. It really is an honest (understandable) mistake. It is people that are asking me to "support" them and they can't even support me enough in return to learn my name. :)

  2. I get it. I usually delete. I get all sorts of pitches as well (granted, I don't have another name that people that could confuse) but often I get ones that make absolutely no sense for me (baby products was a recent one...I have teenagers). Sometimes I do help the people with a pitch, just to be nice, but I think it's important for people to realize it takes time to build that influence and that we all have limited time. And when you are making a request like that, be polite and do a little research.

    1. Often times if someone sends me a thoughtful request and it is obvious that they at least took the time to learn about me before sending their pitch, I will often offer to at least tweet out a link for them or something (if it makes sense for my audience). I am usually very nice. I don't know what came over me. lol

  3. You should not feel bad. I have reached my limit as well. A couple of months ago I got a cluster of emails saying "Dear " I totally called some of them out on it. They were so apologetic, it was an oversight...blah blah blah. I was cordial about it, but I did say something along the same lines as you did: if you are requesting a partnership, you should at the very least use my name; you will have a hard time getting me and other bloggers to work with you otherwise.
    Oh and my dad's legal name is slightly different from what he goes by, so just like your dad, he always knows when an 'unknown' is calling him :)

    1. I'm glad it just not me! It really was the first time in over 3 years that it irritated me enough to warrant a response. I was annoyed that he said MOST bloggers are looking for great content. Yeah, most bloggers are looking to create their own great content. :)

  4. Hilarious! I have gotten emails before that said "Hi [name}" . A little effort to actually put a name in there would be nice;)

  5. Preach it! It always boggles my mind, but I guess it's the difference between a "spray and pray" PR approach and the REAL way to get it done - developing personal relationships, just like it's done everywhere else in life.

    Having said that, I'm convinced that my dog Ellie can read fan mail... the fact that she enthusiastically eats her own poop notwithstanding.

  6. First of all, it's kind of creepy in a cool way that you COMPLETELY know what the inside of brain looks like! And second, HOW FRIGGIN' RUDE CAN YOU BE LAME SALES GUY??? Not being the confrontational type, I so would have never missed out on the fun of asking said twit if he had bothered to go to one click further and actually SEE who Ollie is. Oh wait, that would hav required a miniscule amount of what's that again? Oh yes, COMMON SENSE. Imagine that! :) And yes, that is a NON sarcastic smiley face, lol!


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